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Meet my boys.

These are my two little boys, Bailey and Noah. They are brothers and best friends. And I am lucky to have adopted such lovable little creatures.

Bailey is handsomely monochromatic and mouthy. He talks all the time. Tells you you're doing it wrong. Orders you to give him things. If he were human he would be smooooth with the ladies, drink fine wine, and drive a slick black porsche (with leather, of course) really fast around curves.

Noah, on the other hand, is the beer drinkin' type. (And he's got the beer belly to prove it.) He would wear his baseball hat backwards, get into regular fist fights, and call girls "chicks". You'd be a friend unless you proved untrustworthy, then he'd just whip ya ace and send you home.

But they are cute as the dickens. Their latest accomplishment is when their food bowl is empty, they pull it out into the middle of the walkway and stand on it. They absolutely do not want you to overlook the fact that they are starving to death. To death. And they want you to feel as guilty as a little "mew" can make you feel. "mew". See...feeling guilty, aren't you?