Been thinking a lot about choices lately. Choices that lead us in different directions, on different paths. I feel like I have control over a lot of what happens to me, like I'm playing some kind of video game...except that the main objective is more than killing the evil king, or whatever (I hate video games...why am I using this analogy?). It's more complicated than that, I think. (Maybe not though.) The choices we make affect what happens to us. If we decide to not pay our mortgage, some scary man with a baseball bat will come and kick us out. If we decide to sell all our belongings and travel the world for a year, then we go broke but have invaluable memories and experiences. I'm being a little flippant, but you get the idea.
Career-wise I know this is true. I wasn't satisfied with my previous job as an art director, so I did something about it. I worked really hard to change directions. And I did it, even though it was really hard and really scary. I have a career that gives me great satisfaction. It's not always peachy and wonderful, but I know I'm at least on the right path.
Same thing with marriage. I chose to marry someone who is patient and kind and intelligent (not to mention good-looking)...someone who challenges me and I love to be with. And that choice has affected my whole life, obviously.
But this goes for the little things, too. (I always get tripped up by the little things.) I mean, if I'm in a bad mood, that's my fault, right? It's my perception of the situation. It's my reaction. And I have the power to change it. Alter my thinking. Change how I handle the situation. And usually, I know what to do to make that change. For example: Two Saturdays ago I was moping around, feeling pretty blah. And I really was just wallowing in it (feeling sorry for myself, as my mom says right before she kicks my butt). And it crossed my mind what would help: a long hot shower, some comfortable clothes and a day out doing something like a movie or antiquing or a walk in the park. So I did just that. I got cleaned up and went out. And I felt much better.
So I'm trying to apply this idea to my whole life...seeing what I can improve/change. Right now I'm not liking where I live because the highway is so loud behind my house. And I love to be outside, so this is a problem. So, we are going to start looking for new digs (nothing urgent, just hoping the longer we look, the more likely we are to find the perfect thing).
Also, I don't like that I suddenly have this poochy belly. So I'm running a lot and doing yoga to get rid of it. And I'm starting to eat healthier food. I love taking care of myself and feeling strong.
Large or small, I think we have the power to do something about it, whatever that "it" is. Choose to be where and who we are.
Think your hair is mousy brown? For god's sake, dye it a fun color. Tired of not being energetic? Walk in the mornings. Drink some water. Hate that your wardrobe consists of black and blue? Buy something bright to mix in. Hate your job? Start thinking about what you'd like to be doing instead, and look into that.
Okay, I'll get off my soapbox now (hee). I was just happy to finally put this feeling into words for myself. I'm off to change some stuff (aka...mow the lawn).